source: elegantwordart2.blogspot.com

Last week, I spoke about how marriage changes friendships, but I think it’s safe to say that marriage changes EVERYTHING. Don’t you agree? One of the major changes that stands out, however, is my relationship with my sister. I always knew the change was coming though. I remember back to 1997 when I started dating my first boyfriend. My sister didn’t like it at all. She was envious of my newfound interest and wanted my undivided attention. But I was growing up as we all do, and I was no longer interested in the same things as my little sister.  

Way before I started dating my husband, my sis and my husband were friends. In fact, I grew to know my husband because of their friendship. They were happy hour partners. When my husband and I started dating though, the predictable happened. Not only did my relationship with my sis change, but her relationship with my husband did as well. The 3 amigos diminished into 2. As I said, this is a predictable thing and I’m 90% sure that it should change. There’s a part of me however that wishes that the 3 of us could hang out at happy hours, and more than that, be how we used to be.  My sis admitted that she draws back whenever I get into a relationship. A tweeter commented on last week’s post that she usually gives newly married girlfriends space, so this is just a case of being respectful. But I don’t know how I feel about this. Why does it feel so unsettling?

Question to the audience: Does your sisterhood or sibling relationship have to widen or change when you get married? Is it possible to stay as close as when you were kids? Is this the same situation we spoke about last week as regards to girlfriends relationships changing? I really want to know because I’ll probably apply the answers to my personal life. I have conflicting feelings about this one!  Hit me!

jendayi

Can you believe it’s already mid December? Well in the bridal world that means it’s bridal show season  ( cue drum roll ) ! Mark you calender for the following events;

Trunk Shows-

Maggie Sottero Trunk Show  ( love those corsetted backs)
January 28, 29, 30 2011
P Lawrence Bridals and Formals 336 Main St. Gaithersburg, MD 20878
Call for appointment 301.977.6531
www.plstage.myshopify.com

Anne Barge Trunk Show
January 21-23, 2011
Betsy Robinson’s Bridal 1848 Reisterstown Rd. Baltimore, MD 21208
Call for appointment 410.484.4600
www.robinsonsbridal.com
Monique Lhuillier Trunk Show
January 20-23, 2011
Carine’s Bridal Atelier 1726 Wisconsin Ave. NW Washington, DC 20007
Call for appointment 202.965.4696
www.carinesbridal.com

 Bridal Shows

Washington Bridal Showcase
Saturday January 16, 2011 11 am-5 pm
Washington Convention Center 801 Mt. Vernon Pl. NW Washington, DC 20001
301.wed.ding
$10 at the door, $8 prepaid online
www.bridalshowcase.com

2011 International Bridal Show
Sunday December 12, 2010 12-4pm
Loews Annapolis Hotel 126 West St. Annapolis, MD 21401
410.790.8170
$8 at the door, $5 prepaid online
www.troseimg.com/index-8.HTML 

Greater Virginia Bridal Show
Sunday January 9, 2011 1-4 pm
Hospitality House and Conference Center 2801 Plank Rd. Fredericksburg, VA 22401
$7
www.vabridemagazine.com
Winchester Bridal Expo
Sunday January 9, 2011 11:30 am-4pm
Shenandoah Valley Golf Club 134 Golf Club Circle Front Royal, VA 22630
Free
www.winchesterbridalexpo.com

Great Bridal Expo
Sunday January 23, 2011 12-4pm
Hilton Alexandria at Mark Center 5000 Seminary Rd. Alexandria, VA 22311
$7 prepaid $9 cash at the door
www.greatbridalexpo.com

My advice for bridal shows is print your info ( name/email/ cell ) on an address label. Vendors collect your  information   and you don’t have to waste time by filling out a million things. For more of my Bridal show advice go to

http://talesofaweddingbelle.blogspot.com/2010/10/preparing-for-bridal-expos.html

Happy Shopping!

Katie

http://talesofaweddingbelle.blogspot.com/

Do you think it’s important to have married friends as a married couple?

Can married men have female friends?

Should a married person have a close friend of the opposite sex?

After you marry, does your relationship with your best friend of the opposite sex change?

Can married men and women just be friends with people of the opposite sex? 

Will your relationship with your single friends change after you get married?

source: everydaypeoplecartoons.com

These are some good questions. I have my thoughts on each, but I think it’s up to each couple to figure out what’s comfortable for them. In the long run, the goal should be to protect your marriage. I have you mutual trust and understanding, friends (married or single) shouldn’t be an issue.

I’m personally working on building friendships with married couples. I like married couples. They’re good for hubby and my relationship. We all talk about the same things and understand each other’s issues. I can speak to my married girlfriends about topics that my single friends wouldn’t understand. On the same token, single girlfriends can help you stay attached to who you are as an individual; the person you were before you got married. I remember the fun things I used to do before I got married through my single friends. I don’t know what I would do without both sets. (As for the opposite-sex, close friends… I have none being that they all tried to take it past friendship at some point. And isn’t that always the case? Hmm.)

So as we sang in our little kiddie voices in my girl scout days, “Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other is gold.”

What do you think? Do you forsee any issues with your old friends once you get married? Have you and hubby-to-be already discussed this? What did you come up with? Discuss!

jendayi

Since day 1 my fiance and I have made food and music are priorities for our big day. We knew we wanted good music so our friends and family could dance the night away with us! We met dancing, and it’s something we just love to do (even in our living room) so we knew we’d be willing to spend a little more in that area because it does mean so much.

Originally we had really been mentally committed to the idea of a band. Weddings we have been to with bands have been amazing, not that the DJ”d wedding weren’t.. but bands seemed to create the kind of energy we were looking for. We started doing research immediately after our engagement in June and were quickly awakened to how darn expensive a good band really is! Because we would want a good band that’s been around a while that’s about 6-8 pieces we started to realize it may not be realistic for us. Sticking to budget is so tough!

Loosing the band idea was something I had to grieve before I could start looking at dj’s. Allowing myself to change my vision for our day was not easy but once I gave myself the space to think about how awesome a DJ could be I started to get excited! With a DJ we didn’t have to worry about range of music, and we could appeal to our diverse guests. We met with our first potential DJ over the weekend and he was really cool! We loved that he was flexible and would be willing to play Dance Hall, Rat Pack, Motown, Classic Rock and a little top 40. He had great ideas for keeping everyone on the dance floor. His energy really won me over! There is so much to consider, but I’m feeling good about a DJ (the right DJ) being the perfect choice for our big day. What did you consider while planning entertainment for your big day DC brides?

It must be said that as a planner, I have encountered my fair share of “experiences” on sight at weddings.  Most couples get so caught up in the excitement of their pending union that they sometimes neglect the needs of those who come to watch them become one.  Here are a few tips to keep in mind to ensure your guests are having a blast!

 1) Seat guests with people they know

Love is in the air at weddings, but clearly this is NO time to play match maker with your seating arrangement!  If you have invited friends from college, colleagues from work and your neighbor from across the hall, be sure to seat them with people they’ll be comfortable spending a couple of hours of their lives with.  The last thing you need is to have guests rearrange their own seats in order to sit with who they want (Lord knows I’ve done this myself and the guests were ever so grateful, but it definitely jacked up the number of persons per table).

2) Pick entertainment that suits your guests

You know your family; and your future spouse knows his or hers.  If you know only Uncle James and Aunt Karen shake a leg at every function, choose a band or DJ that they can dance to.  However, if you know Uncle James and Aunt Karen are the ONLY people to ever two-step at your family functions, you may want to switch your style and select something that fits your audience.  If your families combine to be a unique cast of characters, they may enjoy a dinner theater.  Sophisticates may enjoy a private gallery showing from a prominent artist.

3) Know your ratio of Men to Women (and their relationship status)

This is where we can be brutally honest for a moment.  Stereotypes dictate that women attend weddings to find suitors…and men attend because…

Be sure to have a decent ratio of single persons to married persons.  Better yet, allow single guests to bring their significant others so that they’re not left in that awkward single person mood (sitting at the “single” table) trying to make small talk amongst other uncomfortable guests.

The purpose of entertainment and seating are to place guests with familiar persons and to participate in an activity that expresses your desires as a couple.  DJs and bands are an expected “necessity”.  Feel free to choose an entertainment style that suits your audience—and make sure they’re enjoying it with people they love as well.

______________________________________________________________

Sharia Barksdale is the CEO & Director of Events at Socialite Event Management; a Washington, DC based event & wedding planning boutique.

It’s everyone’s favorite part of the wedding; where all can let loose and have fun. It’s the reception.

If the reception is being held at the same venue and immediately following the ceremony, you can simply put the information at the bottom of the main invitation (i.e.- reception to follow). However, if your ceremony and reception are at two different venues, it is helpful and is a nice touch to include a reception card. This card invites your guests to the reception. If there is a significant amount of time between the ceremony and reception, this card serves as a great way to point it out. Reception cards should be worded as follows:

1) Reception immediately following the ceremony.
XYZ Country Club
1234 Main Street
Anytown, USA

OR

2) Dinner and Dancing at six o’clock in the evening
XYZ Country Club
1234 Main Street
Anytown, USA

OR

3) Please join us for cocktails, dinner and dancing
at six o’clock in the evening
XYZ Country Club
1234 Main Street
Anytown, USA

The response card

Now that you have your invitations and reception cards worded, you will need to know who is going to be joining you on your big day.

If you used ‘honor/honour’ on your invitation then the word ‘favor/favour’ should be used on your response card. For example:

The favor of a reply is requested by
the fifth of December

M____________________________________
Accept(s) __________
Regret(s) __________

If you used the ‘pleasure of your company” on your invitations then the appropriate wording for your response card would be ‘Kindly reply by’ or ‘Please reply by’.

Additionally, if your reception location requires guests’ menu selections in advance, you should include those options on the response card. A separate card with directions and maps to the ceremony and/or reception can also be included in your invitation suite. If you have a wedding website, your direction card is a great place to mention that as well.

The Envelope Please…

So, it’s not an Academy Award envelope. However, receiving an elegant envelope addressed in beautiful calligraphy can be just as exciting.

Before you address your wedding invitations, consider their protocol. How will you address the envelope for a couple who are not married but cohabitating? What is the accepted practice for addressing a woman who is divorced or widowed? Should children be included on the envelope?

The outer envelope is one component that should be more formal, using the title and full name of the invitee. Follow these rules and you’ll sail through the process:

• Phrasing for a married couple with same last name: Traditionally, the invitation should read: Mr. and Mrs. John Doe. However, for less formal occasions, Jane and John Doe is acceptable.
• Addressing an unmarried, cohabitating couple (same rule applies to engaged couples or same gender couples: On the outer envelope, write out their full names on separate lines typically you would put the women first however, if you know the man better it is appropriate to have him first on the envelope. For example:
Ms. Sarah Smith
Mr. Jason James
On the inner envelope, write Mr./Ms., first name, and last name again on separate lines. These rules also apply to same gender couples. An example is:
Ms. Amy Jones
Ms. Jane Smith
Married couples with different last names: On the outer envelope, write out their full names on the same line with an ‘and’ joining the two names. Typically, the woman’s name goes first (i.e– Ms. Sarah Smith and Mr. Jason James). On the inner envelope, write Mr./Ms., first name, and last name again on the same line. These rules also apply to same gender couples who are married and have different last names (i.e.- Ms. Amy Jones and Ms. Jane Smith).
• Wording for a divorced or widowed woman: For a widow or divorced woman retaining her married name, address the envelope as Mrs. Jane Doe. If she has reverted back to her maiden name, then Ms. Jane Smith.
• Writing out an invitation for those who are titled: If it is a married couple with both serving in the military, either: Captain John Doe then Captain Jane Doe OR Captains Jane and John Doe. If only one of the spouses is in the military, it would read: Captain and Mrs. John Doe. On the inner envelope, you would write: Captain and Mrs. Doe. These same rules would apply to scenarios where one was a judge or doctor. For example, The Honorable and Mrs. John Doe or Doctor and Mrs. John Doe.
• Including children on the envelope: If the child is 18 or older, he or she should be given their own invitation, addressed Mr./Miss/Ms. first name and last name. For children under the age of 18, address the parents, Mr. and Mrs. John Doe, first on the outer envelope. Then on the inner envelope below Mr. and Mrs. Doe, list the children’s first names only in descending age order.
• Completing the envelope for single persons with a guest: Address the person you know first. So, Miss/Ms. Jane Doe. Then list her guest, Mr. John Smith, below her name. If you do not know the guest’s name ahead of time, then the outer envelope should be addressed to Miss/Ms. Jane Doe only. However, on the inner envelope, write Miss/Ms. Jane Doe and guest.

There you have it. Following the above protocol will ensure that you won’t offend any of your guests. In addition, it will convey how much you care about each of them as you include them in your special day.

Sarah Fletcher Photography

This Sunday we get to meet the wonderful and very talented Sarah Fletcher of Sarah Fletcher.  She is located in Bethesda, Maryland  and she strives to take the highest quality image that captures the heart and soul of the subject and day.

Katie-What drew you to photography?

Sarah-I first fell in love with photography in my high school dark room.  I was fortunate enough to have great, excited teachers who passed on their passion for creativity and the fine art.

I love photography because it serves as a medium that I can capture the essence of someone when I met them.  It can be raw and real but best of all– it grows better with time.  If I take a brides portrait, and they want to look right away and critique themselves [they all do!], my new phrase I tell them? Wait 5 years and you will love it.

 K-How did you become involved with wedding photography? 

S-Weddings are fabulous (details, dresses, delicious food, flowers, family)!  I love everything to do with weddings and romance.

I first considered event planning, but after my closest friends got married, and I couldn’t put down my camera—even when I was a maid of honor–I realized I was lucky that I knew what I wanted to do and I should embrace it– give it 100%.  My favorite photographer, Jasmine Star, spoke recently at a DC seminar for photographers and she said: “Better to fail at something you love, than to succeed at something you hate” and I have adopted this as my mantra.

K-What’s your favorite aspect of a wedding?

S-Immediately following the ceremony, when I can grab the newlyweds and take a few shots of them as hubby and wife, two lives intertwining and the moment they will never forget.  The bride and groom just glow with happiness and are calm and content. Even if we have only a few minutes before they head to their cocktail hour or more formal photos with the bridal party, tender moments are always present.

K-What kind of camera(s) do you shoot with?

S-It’s guaranteed I am the one of the only photographers who has BOTH Nikon & Canon gear… hear me out before you laugh… because yes, I have two of everything! DSLR’s, flashes, lenses, etc!

 Until May of this year, I shot only my Nikon D700… yet I was torn with all the amazing things I had been hearing about a Canon lens (the f/2.8 24mm-70mm) which sadly, Nikon didn’t make… so I bought the new Canon 5D Mark II, so I could shoot with that lens…. it is INCREDIBLE and I would venture to say I will never go back. 

K-Where do you find inspiration for your pictures?

S-Blogs, Jasmine Star, National Geographic (this probably sounds unusual, but the level of photojournalism is unmatched), but above all? People. 

K-Do you have a signature shot? 

S-No, but I am trying to perfect the ‘faux candid’ –as I like to term it— which is when I set up everything in the frame and then have the couple slowly move or look at each other or laugh… while that might not qualify as a strict candid, I find natural emotion and intimacy within the setup that comes candidly.  My first love is portraiture, so I am drawn to faces, eyes and interactions between people.

K-What questions should brides ask when interviewing with wedding photographers?

S-Everything.  You should feel completely comfortable communicating with your photographer and the person that will absolutely be with you every minute on your special day.  If you can’t ask him/her ‘Do you feel comfortable shooting my bridal party of 16?’ while interviewing, then good luck trying to figure how he/she will react when your father-in-law forgets his tux and shows up 1 hour and a half late (this happened to me on a huge wedding I did), messing up the entire timeline your photographer had scheduled. Ask if their style of shooting is upfront and if they arrange the shots, or if they prefer to hang back in the sidelines and let the wedding day unfold naturally.  There are benefits to both, but it’s good to know–besides their style of photographs– how they actually physically take them.  

K-What are some fun poses or props couples can use to incorporate their personality into their photos? 

S-A portrait is a reflection of a person; that being said, I recommend that brides can bring anything they love: maybe hobby-related items such as fresh flowers, an old camera, a vintage bicycle, an instrument or wear what holds special meaning to them; a grandmother’s emerald ring, the scarf they were wearing when they got engaged, etc.  I constantly ask brides if they feel comfortable in a pose, because their uncertainty can often be detected in a shot. 

K-I always recommend my bride’s to have a list of must have shots to give to their photog. Do you have any recommended shots? 

S-Aside from family formals, I usually throw the list to the wind and shoot as I see it.  I make sure to cover all the traditional shots, but I look for images that reflect the feeling of the day and those special moments in between the set-up shots. 

K-What are some upcoming trends in wedding photography? 

S-Fantastic brightly colored wedding heels for the bride to wear under her gown, or having a favorite pair dyed to match the wedding accent color.   Also,very modern albums with a lot of negative space and large pictures.  This probably isn’t cutting edge trendy, but I know that my mother’s wedding had neither and that was 29 years ago (her anniversary is today, so I thought that an appropriate example).

K-Where are some your favorite local settings to shoot for engagement (or day) pictures?

S-Georgetown, hands down.  (Blues Alley, the canal, the store fronts, cobbled stone roads; I could shoot every single session in Georgetown and still discover new spots!) The only downside is parking…

K-What is your advice for a bride in order to get the most out of her wedding pictures?

 S-Be specific about what you want, after all, it is YOUR special day!

K-How can brides contact you to set up an appointment? 

web:      www.sarahfletcherphoto.com

blog:      www,sarahfletcherphoto.squarespace.com

cell:        202 503 4742

email:     sarah@sarahfletcherphoto.com

facebook:    sarah fletcher photography

source: http://tucsoncitizen.com

Hey all! How was your holiday?! Well I hope. I’m sorry I missed you guys last week. I totally intended on blogging, but when my family arrived from out of town, blogging was the last thing on my mind. Please forgive me!

Well, this week, I’m back with a thought. Or an observation rather….Do any of you guys watch “The Real Housewives of Atlanta/DC/Beverly Hills/Orange County” tv shows? Well, I happened to tune into the one that takes place in Atlanta out of curiousity. During the shows taping and before it actually aired, I saw articles on the alleged divorce between one of the housewives and her husband. So naturally, I was interested to see what led up to the divorce when the show actually aired.

Without re-telling the entire show, I’ll just tell you that the husband and housewive were going through some marital issues. One day, out of frustration, the husband goes off and vents to a radio personality (not a friend) about his marriage. The conversation ends up on tape, unbeknownst to the husband, and the recording inevitably gets back to his wife. Not to mention that many other Americans who were tuned in to that station at the time heard the horrible rant as well.

Now ladies and gentlemen, brides-to-be and grooms-to-be. Let me tell you something straight up. That, my friends, is how you ruin a marriage. There is a loooooong list of things that are prohibited in marriage. One of them is DO NOT SPEAK BAD ABOUT YOUR MATE TO OTHER PEOPLE! Especially not to people you can’t trust. Unless you are speaking to a counselor or objective close friend or family member, please keep your issues between you and your mate. One of the most unloving things you can do is spread rumors and gossip about the one you love, simply because you are upset. Why? Because when you’re upset, you tend to exaggerate. Words like ‘always’ and ‘never’ start to enter the picture when the situation most likely isn’t that extreme. What’s even more dangerous however, is that you ruin the trust.

I remember back to our pre-marital counseling sessions where it was said to ensure that you are uplifting your mate in the eyes of others. Let others see how much you love and respect your marriage mate. Help others to value your mate just as you do. Just because you’re mad at him or her, doesn’t mean that you don’t love that person. If you show your mates flaws to the world, other people will view him or her in that light. Build your mate up instead of tearing your mate down. If you have issues that you need assistance with, speak to someone you can trust in private. Better yet, right now while you’re in wedding planning phase, discuss who you believe would be a good person to get advice from once issues arise. Most likely, each of you will pick a different person, so have a little discussion about whether that person will be objective or will they automatically take sides. I bet you’ll both feel more comfortable when the each of you turns for help.

So as grandma used to say, “if you don’t want your business told leave it in the basket. If you hang it out everyone will see it.” In other words, Do Not Air Your Dirty Laundry in Public!

Agree? Disagree? Speak on it.

jendayi

If you’re planning a wedding full of DIY fun, you’ve probably become besties with the employees at your local Michaels and/or AC Moore. But, there’s a local savvy “source” that you may not have tapped into yet: The Paper Source. They have 3 convenient locations in the DC area and the employees are all craft  junkies with great ideas and a willingness to help.

One of my favorite wedding flairs is pop letters and the Paper Source has a ton. You can get incredibly creative with their appearance and they add a personal and lovey touch to your reception site. You can lay them flat or use an antique-esk easel to add some extra dimention. Making them at home is beyond easy (a 2-step process) and the best part is, they offer some gorgeousness for very little mulah. The Paper Source offers these for 3.75 a piece.

To make these letters “pop” with color and fun, simply browse their extensive selection of paper wrap and grab your favorite one that pulls in some of your wedding colors.

To Do:

1) Trace the letter onto the paper (both sides, of course) and cut pieces out with a little room to spare. Follow this step for the side of the letter as well. You can even use a solid color for the inside for a cool effect. 

 2) Using a paper friendly glue, glue the pieces onto the letters. (*Tip: When doing the face of the letter, go over the side a little. The sides of the letter are easier to fold and can therefore be more precise). 

The Paper Source has three locations for you to check out!

Georgetown

3019 M Street NW
Washington, D.C. 20007
202-298-5545

Alexandria

118 King Street
Alexandria, VA 22314-3218
703-299-9950

Bethesda

Bethesda Row
4805 Bethesda Avenue
Bethesda, MD 20814
(301) 215-9141

You’ve picked out your color palette, your flowers, and your linens. Whatever you do, DO NOT forget the chairs. Many brides overlook this one very important element and the results can be disastrous. Think about the ceremony – unless it’s taking place in a church, your guests will arrive to a sea of chairs and will most likely be the first thing they see. You want to set the mood for your event with the first exposed element to your guests.
 
In this three-part series I’ll be discussing chair options, what to do on a tight budget if you’re stuck with your venue chairs, and how to personalize your chairs – whether it be a Chiavari or a simple folding chair.
 
Your options for chairs are limitless and your rental company should be able to get you almost any chair you might want. Below I’ll breakdown the different varieties and price points. *Keep in mind that different chair categories have different varieties within them.

Chiavari Chair: I call this the king of wedding chairs. This beautiful and sophisticated chair adds elegance, style and comfort to any wedding.The different varieties of these chairs are countless so before settling on a basic black or walnut check out some of the other unique options out there – think gold, silver, and clear. Another way to personalize your Chiavari? Pick a unique cushion!
        Price: range between $7.50 – $10 per chair with cushion

Versailles Chair: This is a beautiful classic chair and perfect for an elegant affair. The most popular colors are mahogany and white but no one said you can’t choose gold. Mix and match the chair cushions for a more playful look.
        Price: range between $9 – $10

Valencia Chair: Its sleek lines make it a perfect choice for a modern, city wedding – think art gallery or museum. Comes in two colors – black and white.
         Price: $15

Mirage Chair: This is one of my favorites because of its unique shape and clear construction. This is another great piece for a modern, city wedding but it can absolutely be incorporated into a country event. It’ll produce some great light reflection in the sun! Comes with or without arms.
         Price: range between $15 – $25

 Vineyard Chair: This heavy, dark wood chair is perfect for exactly that – a vineyard wedding. Its classic lines makes this chair a statement piece. Use light linen to contrast the dark, heavy wood and you’ve got yourself a perfect setting for a garden wedding.
       Price: range between $10 – $12
 

Bamboo Folding Chair: This is a unique chair that is perfect for an outdoors wedding – a beach setting, a tropical setting, and even a garden party. The texture and color sets it apart from other chairs and is definitely a unique detail.
        Price: range between $3 – $5

Wood Folding Chair: This is a great, inexpensive chair option that provides a neutral detail to any decor. It comes in white, black, and natural color. Because of its neutrality there are many options to personalize this chair and I’ll be providing some great examples in Part II of this series. (These chairs now come in a plastic version, which are lighter in weight but look almost identical to their wooden counterparts.)
       Price: range between $3 – $4

Bistro Chair: This is an inexpensive option that is light and easily transported. Perfect for a casual wedding.
      Price: range between $2 – $5

Of course, there are many other chairs out there but this is a good starting point and most rental companies carry these options. When picking a chair, keep three things in mind: Venue/Space, Decor/Theme, and Budget. With so many options a chair is a great way to personalize your event.  
 
Can’t afford a chiavari chair? No problem – join me next time when I discuss budget-friendly options for turning your venue’s eye-sore chairs into beautiful, personalized details.

__________________________________________________________________________

Liza Bourkard is owner and creative director at DBI Events – a floral design company located in DC.